This morning God began convicting my heart for using His presence to build up my ministry. I would come into the presence to build up the power in my life so I can build up a good ministry. It was no longer about my heart longing for His presence but I would come so I would be strong when I pray for people. I would come into the presence to get the oil to heal people (Matthew 25:1-13). It sounds like a noble thing and an honorable thing (Psalms 24:4, Jer. 17:9) but the oil is for the preparation to meet our Bridegroom.
It’s not about the power/oil with the fire, the earthquake, or the strong wind (1 Kings 19:11-12) but being able to even be content if He is calling you into the place of prayer for the rest of your life or even no one knows you (Psalm 27:4; Luke 2:36-38). He is so jealous for us. It’s about Him and us. It’s a scary thing thinking that He knows you because we may be deceived by the giftings of God (Matt 7:21-23) and use the power in the wrong way (2 Kings 2:23,24) that is not in accordance with God’s/Kingdom authority. Why does the power still come even though our hearts are in the wrong place? Because the gifting/calling of God is irrevocable (Romans 11:29)
I believe that when we come to heaven, the ones that are most honored may be the ones we have never heard of who have been called into the hidden/secret place. Their calling is to minister to the Lord through prayer and worship, and they are impacting the world in the spiritual realm on their knees but no one knows them (except the ones in relationship with them). They are the ones that are helping purify the Church with Jesus through prayers agreeing with Him to do it (Ezekiel 44:23). They come into a loving partnership or a covenantal relationship with Him to do what they see Him doing (John 5:19). They take part of every part of His life and embrace the goodness of God and the cry of God. They take what most people want (ex: the joy of the Lord) and they take the part that most people don’t want (ex: the burden of God to cry for the nations). They are willing to take the cup of suffering and say, “Yes, I will do it again and again with you” and carry the cross to follow Him.
When we begin to lose sight of His eyes and the personal relationship in our lives, we will begin to become tired of the work/ministry God has called us to. If we are not careful, we can build up a “successful” ministry with signs, miracles, and power but forget Him. We can work up a ministry and giftings that heal people, that can raise people from the dead, but our inner parts are dying. Or our “successful” ministry (ex: many people coming to the church) can just be a great “business” idea/plan but there is no breath of God upon it.
The ones who have this kind of lifestyle with false motives, God will remove them from His sanctuary (Ezekiel 8,9 focus on Ezekiel 9:6; 1 Pet 4:17).
We need to repent before God and ask forgiveness for USING the Holy Spirit and the anointing in the presence to further our self-worship. He is a jealous God and He will not let His glory go to another.
“If you engage with the Holy spirit because you want to merely be effective in ministry, then you’re developing professional intimacy…and what do we call people who are intimate as a profession?”- Bill Johnson.